Category Archives: parenting

Laundry 101

I made a video to teach my kids how to do laundry – not sure I actually accomplished that though.

NOW FEATURED ON HUFFINGTON POST PARENTS!

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6 Comments

Filed under humor, parenting

Kids: Change the $^*#&% Toilet Paper Roll – A Video

I had the house to myself yesterday so I made a video.

Enjoy!

3 Comments

Filed under comedy, humor, mothering, parenting, video

Martinis & Motherhood – Available today!!

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The book I’m in is available on Amazon today!

From the Press Release:

June, 16 2015 – Mom’s Night Out is set to have a new theme starting this June when Tipsy Squirrel Press releases its first anthology, Martinis & Motherhood: Tales of Wonder, Woe & WTF?!

The book pairs up short and relatable stories of motherhood with customized martini recipes inspired by the tales themselves. Continue reading

13 Comments

Filed under parenting, Writing

My Picture Book Available on Kindle Now

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I wrote a picture book!

It’s a counting book with fun rhymes and cute and funny illustrations by my very talented niece, Natalie Berger, who has a Fine Arts degree in Illustration.

For those of you with tiny tots, or  who perhaps need a little refresher on your  own 1-10’s, it’s a steal at $2.99!

It’s only on Kindle for now, but later, who knows?

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00VJ2C0EM

Reviews are also welcome – thank you!

9 Comments

Filed under babies, books, parenting

Why I Won’t Educate My Kids

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I’ve made what some say is a controversial choice.  I refuse to force-educate my kids.  I will not subject my children to dangerous schoolyards, ever-changing teaching methods, and suspect curriculum just because some expert or some government entity says I have to.

I have thoughtfully considered and researched this choice – both online and through posts on celebrity blogs – and because I am a mom that means that the choice I’ve made is the right one for my kids.

Here are the 5 reasons why I refuse to educate:

1)  BIG EDUCATION CAN’T BE TRUSTED.

One minute it’s “No Child Left Behind” and the next it’s “Common Core.”  One day it’s phonetics, then the next it’s whole word.  Continue reading

25 Comments

Filed under humor, medical, parenting

I’ve Been Translated!

Hey, I’m big in Germany !

My 10 Parenting Tips The Experts Won’t Tell You column was on Huffington Post Parents and then got translated for the German version of Huffington Post.  For some reason I find this thrilling!

Check it out here

And the English version here

Also – I wrote a piece for LitFactor  – about trying to get published.  It’s called “Writers Write and Other Lies”  Check it out here!

After this post, I promise not to jaw on about writing anymore and actually do some.

 

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Filed under parenting, Writing

The FAFSA – New and Improved!


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Everyone hates the FAFSA college financial aid form.  It’s a pain in the neck to fill out, and for middle class families it seems like a big waste of time  – they won’t qualify for need-based aid anyway.

As usual, the government is quick to respond to complaints and is working on revising the form.  And thanks to the kids in my ten-year-old daughter’s “Learn to Code” class who accidentally hacked into the government’s website, I have an early version of the new, improved, FAFSA form.

Will it help middle class families?  Judge for yourself:

PARENTS’ ASSETS:

1. List sum of your parents’ assets plus the fabricated income they listed on line 7 of their federal tax return.

2. What about parents’ “other money” like what they’ve hidden in shady Cayman Island offshore accounts or under the names of dead relatives?  Also include change from sofa, coin jar in laundry room, and that wad of cash they have in the  top drawer of their bedroom dresser where every burglar knows to find it.

3. List amount parents stole from their fellow Americans in government handouts, bailouts, or other entitlements.

4. State the current value of your parents’ home using 2014 currency and assuming that home is listed for sale with the most shark-like real estate agent in town, or, what it’s worth on Zillow. Continue reading

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Filed under college, education, humor, parenting, Uncategorized

Blogger Contest Finalist & NY Times Baby!

I’ve been smiling a lot in the last 24 hours.  Yesterday I found out I am a finalist in the annual Bloggers Idol contest, and today I have a parenting piece in the New York Times Motherlode Blog!  Sorry if it sounds boasty – I’m just very excited!

Next week the Blogging contest begins.  I’ll be updating with details and incessant begging for votes.  (What’s that I just heard?  Was that the sound of one big collective un-follow?)

In the meantime, here is the NY Times piece.

WHEN DO “FAMILY RULES” CHANGE FOR TEENAGERS?
By KRISTEN BRAKEMAN

“But I hate going to their house. The other kids ignore me and it’s boring,” my 9-year-old complained when I told her we were going to a dinner party with my old high school friends and their families.

“I don’t care. It’s a family dinner and we go as a family,” I insisted.

“Then why doesn’t Chloe have to go?”

Hmm. I should have known that decision would come back to bite me. Continue reading

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Filed under parenting, Uncategorized, Writing

My Column in Working Mother Magazine

Here’s a humor piece I wrote that was in the Feb/March issue of Working Mother Magazine.  I wrote it last year when I was trying to talk to my daughter while editing the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction ceremony. Now, I’m in the edit bay on another Rock and Roll Hall of Fame show! Oh, and my daughter thinks she should get half of the money I earned for selling the article.

wkgmotherbrakeman.pdf

7 Comments

Filed under comedy, Family, humor, kids, parenting

Teachers – Give Us Parents A Break!

I know it’s a huge cultural taboo to criticize teachers, but they are not always perfect and I can’t keep quiet about this any longer.

My beef is with the relentless assignment of outside projects.  I am fine with kids doing regular homework, but don’t teachers realize how much time and money these extra projects cost us parents? Continue reading

16 Comments

Filed under comedy, education, Family, humor, kids, mothering, parenting, Uncategorized